Judy, I love what you've written here, painful as it is. I'm beginning to understand what long-term grieving feels like. It's not always acute--nor should it be. And if the memories trigger tears, then let them be good memories. The remembrances that make me smile. They'll never come back, but they never would have. It's an experience I'd never wish on anyone, but there are those moments of respite and laughter. It's not constant grief, and I'm thankful for that. Thanks for sharing. I needed this!